disco daleks

Don’t eat cheese (or LSD) before bedtime

Beneath the spinning dishes, we watched the aardvarks dance,

and twenty shouting fishes, were sent into a trance.

A tailor and a vicar, fell down and writhed around,

while geese with eyes a-glitter, stood cheering on a mound.

Elephants started singing, badgers joined the throng,

a bell-pepper began ringing, and a haddock struck a gong.

Cyclists all rode nude, the skies became quite dark,

a crab with an attitude, said “Ooh, ain’t it a lark!”

I laughed so much my ribs hurt, my eyes were out on stalks,

as bats came from the woodwork, and the rats were made of chalk.

I heard a sudden buzzing, the phantoms did recede,

and wide awake but fuzzy, I got out of bed and peed.
Continue reading



Nautical Miles

‘An octopus is not a cat,’
Miles said, ‘It’s plain to see;

it’s hard to keep one in a flat,
or sit one on your knees.’

The squid’s another cephalopod,
Miles got one: “just for laughs”;

it’s not as friendly as a dog,
but it’s much more keen on baths.

‘I cook it fishcakes every day,’
he told his best friend, Peg;

she looked at him in a sceptical way,
and said: ‘Pull the other leg.’
Continue reading

Risk averse

A brief break from the nail-biting fictional dystopia to honour World Poetry Day – 21st March. Here it is, for better or worse, something silly – a little light verse.

What’s up with Dave?

There was always something odd about Dave,
Maybe it was the shouting at trees?

The fact he ate slugs, and lived in a cave,
Or perhaps ‘cos his friends were all bees.

From his fondness for swearing,
And demeanour – quite scary;

To the mask he was wearing,
He made most folks wary.

I saw him while fishing,
He seemed fairly chipper;

Although his jacket was missing,
And his tie was a kipper!

It’s easy to smirk,
To snigger and stare;

But Dave is no jerk,
He’s an odd billionaire.



I took my snake out for a walk today,
Down to the lake with the talking carp;

While I sat and watched pink elephants play,
He splashed about, it was such a lark.

Sparrows roared, then danced a jig,
A duckling laughed, and clapped with glee;

I found it strange, my eyes grew big,
Maybe someone’s spiked my tea?

Copyright J.Lennick 2016. All rights reserved.

Poetry cornered ll

Green smoothie pictureOkay, one more dose of ‘humorous verse’, then I promise to inflict no further verbal vandalism upon an utterly disinterested world. For now anyway.

I will return to ‘normal service’, with more incoherent ramblings and disrespecting well-known art masterpieces.

There is also the nail-biting and completely miss-able final installment of the adventures of the world’s least helpful superhero – Procrastination Man.

Continue reading

Poetry cornered?

Shakespeare bust pictureI’ve never been a great one for poetry, cockney rhyming slang is probably the nearest I ever got to a couplet in my youth. But what about verse? Is there a big difference?

It seems real poetry is a deadly serious business, with strict rules and regs. It nobly aims to stir the soul and enrich the spirit.

Verse is, perhaps, its rather more lighthearted cousin, playful, sometimes a bit silly and therefore entirely appropriate here. So in a fit of possibly ill-conceived and hubristic folly, I scribbled down a few lines.

I may inflict more on an unsuspecting world, depending on the quantity of bribes or death threats I receive demanding that I cease and desist.

Continue reading