Don’t eat cheese (or LSD) before bedtime

Beneath the spinning dishes, we watched the aardvarks dance,

and twenty shouting fishes, were sent into a trance.

A tailor and a vicar, fell down and writhed around,

while geese with eyes a-glitter, stood cheering on a mound.

Elephants started singing, badgers joined the throng,

a bell-pepper began ringing, and a haddock struck a gong.

Cyclists all rode nude, the skies became quite dark,

a crab with an attitude, said “Ooh, ain’t it a lark!”

I laughed so much my ribs hurt, my eyes were out on stalks,

as bats came from the woodwork, and the rats were made of chalk.

I heard a sudden buzzing, the phantoms did recede,

and wide awake but fuzzy, I got out of bed and peed.

***

Daleks at the disco

We saw them on the dancefloor,

they scared us half to death,

people running out the door,

while others held their breath.

‘Exterminate!’ they shouted,

and blasted folks with rays,

we never should have doubted,

that Daleks don’t behave.

All at once a box appeared,

the Tardis was its name,

I thought ‘this place is getting weird,

but it ain’t no bloody game’.

Then Dr Who came rushing out,

‘Get in!’ he quickly said,

and we were left in little doubt,

to stay we’d wind up dead.

The night was filled with fever,

and fearsome metal foes,

’til the Doctor pulled a lever,

and said ‘It’s time to go!’

Through time and space we hopped,

eyes wide and legs of jelly,

till finally we stopped,

and found ourselves in Delhi.

‘I think we’re safe’ he told us,

‘They won’t find us in a hurry,

now let’s go do some dancing,

and then we’ll have a curry’.

 

© Copyright Jason Lennick 2017

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